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i was in the shower, and i decided. i'm not gonna drop partying altogether next semester. i'm still gonna be partying. and slacking. and going out.

and the agenda still stands. ain't no fun partying without a cutie. so maybe thats how i'll "cut down". haha.



funny how i waited for you, with anticipation.

Labels: boys, eyecandy, jammers, Newport, silver, this chapter is called..., WestBev

so apparently, semester starts on the 18th of january. that gives me, 11 days left. wow i've started counting.

went to see the dean yesterday since i've decided to stay on for another semester. and she's gotten me taking extra classes, so i can graduate faster. she's really nice. but now i'm scared cos i'm piled! she says i can surely get through, and i'm hoping she's right.

it's gonna be work non-stop if i wanna even try for my straight As. ): sounds rather exciting. somehow, the stressful chaos excites me. though my partner in stress is gonna be gone. dennyboy. ): but now i'll have yizheng who's apparently taking a lot of the classes i'm taking. so that'll be sweet.

which reminds me. i dont know how i'm gonna keep up the lifestyle of partying, now that i got way more work to cope with. and thats gonna be sad cos i love planning the party drama with yi. ugh....

i have a plan though. called the OASAP. stands for, Out As Soon As Possible. means that whenever i get a new piece of assignment, i finish it asap. then maybe i'll have free time to party. but of course, the whole thing will only work if i get over my laziness.

never mind. four months of non-stop action. and i hope i come out alive.

so, since the next four months is gonna be intense, i've decided to not use any brain energy for the next 11 days. i'm gonna conserve every bit of brain energy for that semester of racing through work.

omg.... more classes!! means less going out, less partying, less hanging out.

oh shiat. i just checked. it's not four months. it's like 5. rawrr!

only one thing to do, MAKE USE OF THE NEXT ELEVEN DAYS TO DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANNA DO.

AND NO BRAIN UTILIZATION! NO READING, THINKING.

i'm gonna be dumb for the next 11 days. so dont ask me anything intellectual. i'm conserving my brain.

yay. somehow, i really can't wait to live everything out. sounds like an awesome plan. haha. the slacking, and the slaving. everything's perfect now. and i can't wait to get busy.

know what will make things more awesome? if i had a boyfriend or girlfriend who is so madly in love with me and who will be effingly supportive when the academic chaotic buzy-ness comes. i think it would be very fun to have someone like that by my side who i can turn to whenever.

yeah. i said girlfriend. and of course, i'm referring to sam ronson. and maybe ellen cos i think she's too damn funny. i love her.

haha alright, i think i'm gonna shower now, and later do whatever the hell i want.

Labels: boys, jammers, LA, Newport, silver, this chapter is called..., WestBev

mark hoppus calls it year spaceship. =/ i'm just gonna call it the adventure.

anywayss, here's to 2010. i've always detested new years. seriously. whats so fun about going to school the next day? of living through the crappy long opening months of jan, feb, march, april, may? of christmas ending? my favourite months were always october, november, december. and they always will be.

plus this year, holidays were pretty short for me. december was too short. after all school ended on the 11th... so thats like half a month gone already. ugh. then christmas came so fast, it was all really a blur.

nevertheless, i have to say that hands down last night was like the BEST new years in my entire life. seriously. and credits would have to go to rudy of course. first thing we did at 0000 was walk off from a bar with our glasses. his from vodka, and mine from wine. and those glasses stayed with us all the way till clarke quay. hahah. from city hall. hilarious.

2009 was party year. had so much fun, especially since after As. lived it. party, drinks, friends, out out out! family, girls, guys, school. it was awesome. i love 2009 really.

i'm gonna call 2010 the adventure. cos who knows where i'll end up and the end of next year? great! (:

2008 was the year of self-discovery. i worked towards the As, and just really spent the year taking care of myself since this was the period i stayed single for longest. i made real friendships, and had many nice people around me, helping me along the way. i learnt a lot about myself.

2009, party year.

and 2010, is gonna be the adventure. i cant wait.

Labels: ALEXANDER VII, Angela Ferilli, blood ties, boys, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, jammers, Knights Ridge, Newport, No Reservations, silver, this chapter is called..., WestBev

so those are captures of the aftermath of writing. reminds me of my thesis days in As. the harry potter book. well, today i have another addition to the collection. haha. aztec human sacrifice rituals. soo, if you have no life and want to do some reading, come ask me for a copy. (:

anywayy, the past 28 hours was hellish seriously. research paper and law finals. but i had D on the same boat with me. so i'm cool (: quite fun actually

the song of the 28 hours was Daniel Bedingfield - Gotta get thro this. Hha. over and over and over again man. i'm saving that for future chiong-ing sessions.

today was interesting cos i encountered the big 3, and the other 3.

the big 3 refers to the awesomely smart sexy professors. haha. i'm sorry pardon my explicit opinion. i just really admire smart people.

took the train with THE lance today. and actually texted denny about it. cos inside joke, i'm lance and he's lance impersonator. so actually having THE REAL LANCE right in front of me while i was rushing to absorb my freaking law book was VERY unnerving. i kinda gave up just about at city hall.

omg lawyers. > <

then at school saw tad, but didnt go follow for smoke cos i was really scared about law, so went to panic-study with denny.

and we saw tad and lance talking and walking together and for like 10 seconds we both just stared at the two of them. LOL. damn funny.

but hotness honestly.

the test wasn't so bad. i hope. > <

then after class, talked to mr ethan moore about class and everything. i seriously enjoyed his classes so, thats something i'm definitely gonna miss. all the philo and stuff. he's one smart guy.

then, denny boy and i went home. he grabbed some yoghurt thingy before. then home!~

and thats the end of the big 3. gosh awesome.

then, comes the other 3.

today something weird happened. i spoke to 3 of my exes.

thats it.

haha.

ciao

Labels: ALEXANDER VII, boys, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, grey's anatomy, muse, Newport, silver, through lens, WestBev

you’re so cute.

how you don’t really scold me.

how you catch me staring at you. not that i care if you catch me. you’re irresistible.

your stubbornness is annoying to most. but adorable to me.

your persistence to stick to the rules is awesomely like me. though i won’t really have the guts to persist and tell people they’re wrong.

how you keep reading my words. quite embarrassing actually.

your teasing. it’s just so weirdly geeky. that you had to explain it to me.

and i was more than happy to play along.

by the way, i hate seeing you walk away.

but you came back for me.

you have nice eyes. did you know?

i dont quite want to stay for summer. thats not how i want our interaction to be.

i may be gone by spring anyway. and no, i can’t do that. i’m too stupid for that.

but you always insisted i’m great.

i really dont see it though. no. but it’s awesome to hear you persist about how nice my words are. you have nice eyes. and i’ll listen to anything you say actually. just to stare at you.

but when you go on about how i write so well, you have that smile that’s just too cute. so though i don’t do well with compliments, i swallow them. just so i can enjoy the picture of you happy.

you’re so random. but really, random’s good in my book. i learn a lot from that.

you complained to me today about the 13 hours. and i’ll gladly burn another stick for you.

you’re so cute when you laugh. i made you laugh. and i think that’s the best thing i’ve done today.

i think that’s all. but i wished you knew how much i like being with you.

maybe i’ll steal a hug one day.

maybe.

Labels: boys, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, inspiration, muse, silver, WestBev

okay but our table's not round. just thought the title sounded medieval and cool. nah our table's long.

today is daddy's birthday. 20 mins left. well, to celebrate, we broke Joseph history. first time we had a house steamboat/frying thingy~!!! so cool! like seoul garden at home!

hahaha and it was super fun. veg-free of course.

we just finished eating!! from like 9.45pm to 11.15. i ate like SO SO MUCH. and i like to fry fry. hehe.

either ways, we have vicente to thank. he sponsored everything. (:

xie xie ni.

oh another thing about today.. worked alone with raja today and he was telling me all the damn nice things about london.

aanndd, guess who called while i was preparing for winter's hibernation (aka eating like there's no tomorrow)?

THANA!!! from malaysia!!!! Yeah!! i miss him so so soo much! he's on leave till thursday ):

my deli best friend. my half half! zaarrghghghgh!! come bacck soon!!!

omg but i was seriously so damn happy to hear him.

i cant wait for thursday.

okay i should go get ready or something... lion wants to come down for awhile. for dunno what. stubborn person. hmmph.

Labels: blood ties, boys, daddy, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, Happy Birthday, Newport, No Reservations, silver

i feel much better.

vicente bought for me kfc, cut for me cake, we talked, had fun.

he doesnt judge.

and i owe him a lot for what he did yesterday.

he did a lot that didnt get me into more trouble.

and i've been chatting with bryan. he's been my solace companion throughout my stay here in "suspension dimension".

the only human company i dont mind at the moment.

he doesnt remind me of things i want to get away from. or reality.

comforting how he reminds me of a past. a nice one.

so that made me feel better too.

vicente and bryan.

then there's lion.

he's not having a good day at work too. but its comforting to know i'm on his mind as much as he is in mine.

and thana.

he texted me.

my best friendd of the deli.

made me smile too.

okay and as for the family, i guess it's something i will have to deal with later.

and i will. and we'll work things out cos we always do.

and i'll go back to loving them.

okay its half past 3. it's time for me to walk back outside.

to the life i have,

the good life i have.

the one i wont exchange anything for. regardless of the times i leap over to the greener pasture for a visit.

because this life, made me who i am today. and i am proud of that.

Labels: ALEXANDER VII, Aliens Exist, blood ties, boys, daddy, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, grey's anatomy, Happy Birthday, jammers, Knights Ridge, Newport, No Reservations, silver, this chapter is called..., wordsmagicallyspun

sometimes - just sometimes - i don't like my life.

sometimes - just sometimes - i want to be able to live differently.

sometimes - just sometimes - i don't want the pressure, the expectations.

sometimes - just sometimes - i don't want the status.

sometimes - just sometimes - i want to be away.

but if i could have it my way, to make things the way i sometimes want things to be, i still won't change a thing.

except maybe to be sometimes able to live the way i sometimes want life to be.

will all this ever pay off?

or am i just living in a prolonged state of suspension.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i just woke up like less than an hour ago. (i.e. 11 plus)

sorry if this post sounds airy. i'm still feeling dazed. i hate this feeling. not the physical aspect. but the psychological effects of it on the relationship between myself and family.

yesterday, i got wasted real bad. worst in my entire life. first time i actually puked cos of alcohol. and i can hold my liqueur well. so that's the extent of it.

remember how i've been having awesome days in a row since like 3 days ago?

yeah well the lucky streak stopped at 7pm yesterday.

day started great. was going to work happy. cos was gonna work with selvam and thana. my favourite combi.

then in the train when i messaged that i was going to be late, i got a reply that lion was working instead of selvam!

so another day working with lion!

and i've come to notice that when we work together, the deli's very empty even though it's supposed to be crowded during that time.

its a weird phenomena.

so anyway, lion and thana.

fun as well! they were super nice to me. made me sandwiches... lion was beyond expectations nice. he spread jam on the scones for me. even though he doesnt like being nice.

thana made me a sandwich with vegetable. cos he wanted to get me to eat it. i was whining and whining about it. but i forced myself to eat it in the end. for him. he's my best friend over there. so really, anything for him.

after work, lion and i went for lunch. and he also couldnt believe how nice he was. he was like carrying my bag. and weeks back, we used to quarrel about how ungentlemanly he is. cos he was saying he hate guys who soften up for girls. blahblah.

but really, i appreciated it.

lunch was super fun. again, beyond expectations, lion took out the food for me... arrange nicely...

supposed to go for coffee, but i was running late for dinner with family. aunty evie's birthday. so in the end i just taxied him to work, then i continued down to pasir ris.

and the dread of having to leave him marks the end of my happiness.

cos the party wasn't really a happy thing.

yes i loved seeing my family and stuff. but it was really hard to enjoy myself and be happy when i feel like a betrayer. seriously, i feel like it's my fault that things couldn't have been better. and i was sitting at the main table. i was feeling damn guilty.

so it was hard to mingle, or talk, especially with the main people. so i just mainly haunted the dessert table. and later on the bar.

tried to occupy myself. there wasnt really much for me to do.

then i got drunk.

puked, cried, ugh.

but only cos my family didnt know i was at that state. we got into the cab like normal. and then i puked halfway home.

anyone who knows me will know that when i drink, dont put me in a vehicle. firstly i get road sick very easily. and me having alcohol will just put me in an express flight to pukedom.

so yeah. that really really sucked.

i feel like a loser.

and right now, the only happy joyful thing about my life, sadly, is my work friends. with them, i forget about my cares for awhile. with them, i'm not someone who has to perform. with them, i can be whoever i want to be without worry.

really.

selvam, thana, lion, jave.

Labels: ALEXANDER VII, Aliens Exist, blank, blood ties, boys, daddy, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, grey's anatomy, Happy Birthday, jammers, Newport, No Reservations, sick, silver

have you ever had an i-feel-fugly day out; that was so bad, you just walked into a store and changed into a totally new outfit?

i did today. and felt mucccchhh better afterwards.

no idea why but today whilst getting dressed for work, my style instincts were not working. so so annoying. in the end, i just went back to my alterego-fied style. the standard black spag, jeans, stud belt and vans shoes.

but i still felt unglam.

after work, i decided to go shopping. but cos i was feeling so unglam shopping, i went into mango and came out feeling better. still kept to the style though. just that i felt nicer. hahaa. the retardness of retail therapy.

anyways, work today was KILLER. SUPER busy. to the point one customer actually complained to the F&B head that there was not enough staff at our deli.

KILLER.

[JUST TALKED TO LION FOR HALF AN HOUR!!!]

eloisa - who'd rather be known as elois, pronounced el low weese - and i, were dying together.

thana on the other hand, died already. hahaa.

SUPER busy. BUT SUPER FUN.

anyways, yeah after work, went to shop. but seriously all the clothes suck. i HATE SPRING. i hate the colours. not me. but some are nice, but MOST are too clashy.

i am waiting for FALL/WINTER.

SOON SOON SOON!!!

anyway, then lion came and we ate together.

and crossed road.

okay bye! i wna supper with parents.

and because you called, i threw prada on the bed.

Labels: Aliens Exist, boys, Dirty $exy Money, eyecandy, grey's anatomy, Newport, No Reservations, silver, this chapter is called..., wordsmagicallyspun

ONE: NOoooo!!!!!!

like me for me. the spoiltness and irritatingness. because, i appreciate.

TWO: taxis

i get it, the economy is bad. i've been reading the news regularly of late, and yes, taxis are experiencing significant declines in demand. and i sympathize with them. yes, the global economic contraction is affecting all sectors. BUT, i don't see how the situation can improve with dishonesty.

i understand that the economy is bad, but i dont see why drivers should try to cheat their way for a few more bucks. it just makes the taxi industry look bad, and further discourage commuters from patronizing taxis.

the past two days, i took taxis like 4 times. and 3 times, i got exploited. they took longer routes, and even waited for the meter charge to increase, even though we've stopped at the destination already, before stopping the meter.

i'm not a selfish money-minded person. most of the time, i let drivers keep the change. but i think, honesty is always important. ESPECIALLY during this period of economical crisis. ambiguous financial deals played a great role in causing the crisis. uncertainty and the lack of transparency. we have to start being honest, so that the foundations of business can be strong and reliable. then maybe such disasters can be avoided.

so yeah. taxi companies may not be as big as financial institutions like Lehman Brothers or what.. but it's a start. if SMEs are all going to cheat and exploit where they can, collectively, it's going to be a problem for the service sector; which is also suffering badly from the global recession.

think about it.

THREE: my day  

i had a great day. with family, and with an awesome bunch of stpatricians. cheers~

liverpool won chelsea.

Labels: ALEXANDER VII, blood ties, brain food, daddy, eyecandy, futball, grey's anatomy, louiza speaks, news, silver, the boy

had my favourite kind of stay home family day again.

lots of kfc. and now i think my stomach's aching from all the oil.

but me likey!

took things slow today... resting and stuff. but i feel bad for cutting out on elfy. sorry.

 

my dream

in the lift with family. and he and his friend were there too. (not with us of course)

then they got off.

the lift was blue.

then our floor came. we exited and arrived at aunty vicky's house. like the lift is right in her living room. how cool is that.

cyn and tim were there... aaron too.

dining table. eating some nice biscuits.

then papadi gave us his cookies and cake that's apparently very nice and why aaron was there.

house was quite dark, with a few soft lights.

then suddenly we were all examining the stuff we owned. statues and stone and all.

i love my family. all the relatives.

and i realized the guys in my family are hot.

 

 

i like today.

Labels: blood ties, dreamdiary, elfie, eyecandy, fallacy, God, Knights Ridge, silver

grey

cool

imagination movers

baked hashbrowns

giving delilah

rudy

quiet

light snow

long walks across bridges

amusing

"omg! thats so cute!"

eating desires

anti-italian

jokes

tall-and-tiny

kurt

dangling feet over docks

bridges and cars

sir stamford raffles

clocks and london

water

bus talk

we're slow dancing in a burning room.

Labels: blood ties, Dirty $exy Money, Newport, silver